The Eyes of Da Panther!
Manchester Academy 1 - Monday 14th September 2009
The Panther finally play some shows away from their decade-old residencies in Hollywood and give Manchester a night of rock. It ain't nuthin' but a gooooooood time!
So, I got my ticket finally through the post and I wsa really looking forward to this gig. I've had the Metal Skool CD for years, after first hearing about them on the Metal Sludge site and I was eager to see them after this year's very odd major label deal, initial hype over their first UK show at Donington and the release of "Feel the Steel". So when they announced a date at the smallest Academy with tickets for eleven quid a pop, I went for it. After a week, demand meant an upgrade to the largest Academy venue. I was a bit disappointed that they were going to be taken from their nice little gig and put to a huge one, but there you go... That's the rock elitist in me!
So, I made the plans in the day to meet Marky-Boy and Joss, along with Andy Leg and his crowd at the pub around the corner from the Academy and I set off after tea (Kez didn't bother) into the nigh-eee-ight. I was blasting some Vain to get me in the mood and it was promising to be a good 'un. I got to the car park and left the car and wandered round to see what was what and find people. The queue for the Academy (they hadn't opened the doors yet due to the sound check going on inside "Eyes of the Panther", as I recall) wsa fecking huge, so it was going to be a sweaty and close gig. I took note that the "support" was a DJ bloke, so I took mental note that the Panther set would start at 9pm and I toddled off. Walking up the queue and seeing the people in there showed all aspects of human life. You had old fellas like me, people dressed up in glam-rock outfits and kids who weren't born when Winger's "In The Heart of the Young" was released. There was also a pretty straight split of male and females. I did wonder though, how many people were here because the "Darkness Factor" of Steel Panther. The huge numbers must have been partially down to the ligger effect.
Anyway, we kicked back in the pub for a while and chinwagged amongst ourselves. We hung about for an hour or so and then walked over to the gig at about 8.45 ready to wander in. I'd not been in the newly-revamped Academy 1 since the refit and it all looked very nice, even if the entrance is still a bloody nightmare. We were heading straight in to the hall, so we didn't bother with drinks or anything. There was nothing I wanted to fork out for on the merch table, so I saved some money there! We moved through the packed crowd to a spot on stage-left at the side. It wsa really hot and sticky in there, which wasn't pleasant, but there you go! The DJ fella was playing Bon Jovi and the like over the PA and we only had to wait a few minutes until the lights went down and the gig was ready to run. By this time, we were pretty packed-in, and I'm afraid I was stood next to someone with a serious body odour issue... They f*cking hummed.
The band walked on stage to a massive round of cheers and they kicked into "Eyes of the Panther" which ended like it was the end of the set. I was half expecting a cry of "GOODNIGHT MANCHESTER!" at the end of it, such was the length of the ending! The volume was pretty high, but the sound was still pretty good. The band were playing it up from the off with Micheal Starr doing his Diamond Dave act and his band mates making good use of the stage and working the crowd up. They preened and pranced and did a great job of playing the 80s hair-metallers in a way only an 80s hair-metaller can!
The set was made up of all the songs from the "Feel the Steel" album along with a cover of Van Halen's "Jump!" and an impromptue cover of "Highway to Hell" (more about that in a moment) and the rest of the ninety minute set was made up of them taking the piss out of each other or chatting up the crowd. It was a shame that they couldn't put some more cover songs in, but it didn't really matter since the talkie stuff was funny. That stuff was funny though and Marky-Boy remarked half-way through one extended rap that they sounded like we did when we start off on some wierd conversation about nothing at all! There was lots of jibes against being "gay", being old (average age of fictional band being mid-40s), lack of musical talent and just being dumb. Politically correct, it was not, but delivered in a non-offensive daft way, if that's possible. The other talk was about the crowd, "putting penises in vaginas", the chicks and how "MANCHEST-er" rocks.
The solo stuff was OK. We had a long guitar section in which Satchel lifted guitar solo slots from everyone and everywhere including "Eruption" and Batten's "Flight of the Bumblebee". He ended up standing behind the drum kit and playing bass drum whilst rocking out some classic riffs from 'Tallica, Deep Purple and other classic rock acts culminating in him doing a one-handed tom solo before chucking his stick in the air and dropping it before the ending! Lexxxi had a "Hair Solo", which consisted of him standing there preening infront of his fan whilst the rest of the band helped to blow his hair back.
They really were pretty funny when they started with each person really playing up their character. Lexxi Foxxx (voted the sexiest dude on the Strip two weeks in a row in 1988) was great with his stage fan, omnipresent hand-mirror and endless hair-preening (think Jimmy D'Anda in 1990) bit. Satchel pulled all the lead guitarist faces you could imagine and taking the piss out of his bass player. Starr was dubbed a "Tubby Diamond Dave Wannabe" and he really did have his DLR leaps and stage moves down pat. Stix rocked away at the back and kept it metal with lots of back-spinning on the sticks and all that.
There were, of course, plenty of stage invasions, mostly by girls. There was lots of flashing, as you'd expect too. At one point, I think there were seven or eight of them up there gyrating away. They all looked a bit young though, and this was commented on by Satchel at one point; "Dude, she looks young enough to be your grand-daughter!" There was also a stage invasion by the "Shocker" dude dressed in a big home-made Shocker hand. He left around the stage during the appropriate number, which was amusing.
The other guest appearance was by some chap who had won a competition to play on the "Death to All But Metal" number. He looked like Rob Loonhouse, but with a real guitar. He played pretty good though and was having a whale of a time up there ripping out a fair solo and then running through an impromptue "Highway to Hell" after. He did good and kept the crowd laughing along with him.
The set ran until 10.30 which gave us a ninety minute set, which was pretty good. We'd had a good show and everyone was leaving the room with a smile on their face. We were all hot and sweaty and aching from laughing. The band delivered a fun and tight set, honed to ridiculous perfection and full of daft laughs. It debatable whether the whole crowd appreciated the Winger jokes and all that, but everyone was entertained, and that's what counts. Whether you could see the show night after night is also debatable since they are plugging a record and not just doing one of their residency shows on this tour. Still, you certainly got your eleven quid's worth.
We all filed off into the night and said our goodbyes. I stopped back for a while at the stage door with the other liggers since the band were actually there and didn't keep everyone waiting for ages. I got a few pics and exchanged a few comments about Sludge (I had my trusty and crusty Sludge top on for the night) and Stevie Rachelle with Stix. Michael told me he "loved me in jail kinda way" to which I replied that was fine as long as he kissed me first. Comments about me expecting him to pay my rent next were laughed up! The chaps looked absolutely knackered, but elated at a good gig and a great response. They must be thanking their lucky stars at the reception that they are getting over here considering this show has been running for so long at home. I do wonder how long they can keep this up over here though since they will be in the targets of those writing off "the trend" of the hair metal spoof off soon. We'll see...
Then it was home time. I toddled off to the car and drove home. Metal Shop Rule. Up the Panther. Sludge forever. KISS are Shite!
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